A Gnome may not gnow everything (but he probably does).
And he may not tell you everything he gnows (because he probably won't feel like it).
But what he does tell you, will be the truth.
Gnomes don't lie.
And if by mistake, they do they certainly won't do it twice.
And he may not tell you everything he gnows (because he probably won't feel like it).
But what he does tell you, will be the truth.
Gnomes don't lie.
And if by mistake, they do they certainly won't do it twice.
Are gnomes real???
Of course!
However, let's be clear on what we're referring to as "real gnomes." Garden gnomes, gnome figurines and statues, cartoon gnomes, fantasy game gnomes, fiction story gnomes, and other human renderings of gnomes, though cute and fun (except when they’re not), are not real gnomes.
Real gnomes are real. Real gnomes, live, breathe and, like all living creatures, eventually die. Gnomes think most gnome-like statues and figurines are rather silly (and a few down-right distasteful), but they recognize them as a symbol of honor and they almost always enjoy them as a compliment. In fact, gnomes have a special fondness for humans who collect such figurines. They regard them as a welcome sign and often choose to live near or with them. They also enjoy moving their statues around at night…to keep the humans on their toes!
However, let's be clear on what we're referring to as "real gnomes." Garden gnomes, gnome figurines and statues, cartoon gnomes, fantasy game gnomes, fiction story gnomes, and other human renderings of gnomes, though cute and fun (except when they’re not), are not real gnomes.
Real gnomes are real. Real gnomes, live, breathe and, like all living creatures, eventually die. Gnomes think most gnome-like statues and figurines are rather silly (and a few down-right distasteful), but they recognize them as a symbol of honor and they almost always enjoy them as a compliment. In fact, gnomes have a special fondness for humans who collect such figurines. They regard them as a welcome sign and often choose to live near or with them. They also enjoy moving their statues around at night…to keep the humans on their toes!
How do you gnow?
The best source BY FAR about real gnomes is the field guide, written by Wil Huygen and illustrated by Rien Poortvliet, titled Gnomes. Published in 1977, everything possible to learn about real gnomes comes either from that ground-breaking field guide (or it’s companion The Secrets of Gnomes, also by Huygen and Poortvliet) or directly from real gnomes (such as the stories on this website).
Contrary to what one human mother told her young child three decades ago, everything in the gnome books by Huygen and Poortvliet is true. COMPLETELY TRUE. That’s why it’s called a field guide and not a novel, for goodness sake. AND it was written by a DOCTOR. Doctors are far to busy to make up stories that aren't true. Besides, the child's camp counselor confirmed ALL of it.
Contrary to what one human mother told her young child three decades ago, everything in the gnome books by Huygen and Poortvliet is true. COMPLETELY TRUE. That’s why it’s called a field guide and not a novel, for goodness sake. AND it was written by a DOCTOR. Doctors are far to busy to make up stories that aren't true. Besides, the child's camp counselor confirmed ALL of it.
Picture of a Gnome?
Gnomes have never been caught in a photograph or video (they are far too fast, far too aware and far too humble. They also have the ability to become instantly invisible, which helps). However, as the field guide of Huygen and Poortvliet explains, gnomes have occasionally allowed themselves to be revealed to humans, Huygen and Poortvliet being two of them. Because Poortvliet was a really good artist and had permission from gnomes to illustrate them as realistically as possible, that fieldguide provide the best pictures available of what real gnomes look like. Here is the most famous picture of a real gnome, which is also the cover of that book:
How tall?
Gnomes are approximately 15 cm (around 6 inches) tall. They are protectors of the natural world and have lived in harmony on earth far longer than humans have existed.
How old?
Gnomes live a minimum of 350 years. Some live to 400, though that is rare (and for most, rather undesirable). Adulthood starts at around 100. Infancy lasts approximately 20 years and gnomes remain in diapers until 12 to 20 years. The “terrible twenties” (the equivalent of the human “terrible twos”) last 10 years.
Kindergarten begins when gnomes reach 50. Gnomes usually marry at around the age of 120, and often have their children as soon as their honeymoon is over. But before you start raising eyebrows, you should gnow: Honeymoons last around 20 years (and you probably don’t want to gnow how long moments of intimacy in bed last).
Kindergarten begins when gnomes reach 50. Gnomes usually marry at around the age of 120, and often have their children as soon as their honeymoon is over. But before you start raising eyebrows, you should gnow: Honeymoons last around 20 years (and you probably don’t want to gnow how long moments of intimacy in bed last).
Gnomes, How?
Gnomes are born as twins (and every once in a great while as triplets) - always as one boy and one girl. Female gnomes give birth only once. Therefore, gnome families usually have exactly 4 members: mother, father, son, daughter. A rare few have a bonus son or daughter. This wasn’t always the case.
There was a time in ancient gnome history when gnomes began overpopulating the earth. Gnome women were getting fed up with being pregnant for decades and dealing with diapers for centuries. To deal with this threat to culture and harmony, the gnomes worked together to solve the problem. They used ingenuity and a bit of magic to reach perfect population control…and give the poor gnome women a break.
There was a time in ancient gnome history when gnomes began overpopulating the earth. Gnome women were getting fed up with being pregnant for decades and dealing with diapers for centuries. To deal with this threat to culture and harmony, the gnomes worked together to solve the problem. They used ingenuity and a bit of magic to reach perfect population control…and give the poor gnome women a break.
Gnome magic?
Gnomes have magical abilities. However, their magic is only effective if it is used to help another creature and cause no harm. Thus, the majority of gnome magic is used for healing. It is impossible to use gnome magic for show, tricks or selfish purposes.
How High?
Gnomes are 7 times stronger than humans and walk an average speed of 15 mph. They can sprint up to 50 mph for short distances, but they average 35 mph over long distances. Gnomes easily jump 2 to 3 feet without a running start (like a frog), but with a running start they can jump 8 to 10 feet. They often augment this with a pole which allows them to vault even greater distances.
Are Gnomes Useful?
Gnomes pursue something they call a "Usefulness." A gnome's Usefulness is the focus into which each gnome pours his or her passion, care, skills and energy to make the world a better place. All gnomes must find their Usefulness in order to live a meaningful life. While many gnomes find one grand Usefulness, others find several over the course of their lives. Gnomes gnow that no one Usefulness is more important than another. The only thing that is important is to have a Usefulness. It is as simple as that.
Gnomes, where?
Humans first encountered gnomes in Scandinavia which is where they are believed to have originated. They later migrated to the lowlands of Northern Europe and also to Siberia.
Today, gnomes heavily populate those regions as well as North America. They can now be found in at least 60 different countries world wide. They are not always gnown as gnomes, however. Depending on the region and its language gnomes are often referred to by different names...some names translate into English as "elves" or "little man" which causes confusion...because Gnomes ARE NOT elves or humans. Some of the common names for gnomes are "Tomte," "Nisse," "Nains," "Tontti," "Foddenskkmaend," "Gnom," Dudje," "Mano," "Kabouter," "Skritek," "Kleinmanneken," or "Domovoi Djedoes."
Today, gnomes heavily populate those regions as well as North America. They can now be found in at least 60 different countries world wide. They are not always gnown as gnomes, however. Depending on the region and its language gnomes are often referred to by different names...some names translate into English as "elves" or "little man" which causes confusion...because Gnomes ARE NOT elves or humans. Some of the common names for gnomes are "Tomte," "Nisse," "Nains," "Tontti," "Foddenskkmaend," "Gnom," Dudje," "Mano," "Kabouter," "Skritek," "Kleinmanneken," or "Domovoi Djedoes."
What about fairies, elves and pixies?
Gnomes are NOT fairies, elves, dwarfs or pixies. They are also clearly not giants, trolls or humans. Each of these different species have unique characteristics that make them significantly different from the others. We recommend not mixing them up during an encounter - none like to be mistaken for the other.
Smurfs? Gnomeo? The 7 dwarfs?
There are no real life smurfs. There are also no real life blue and red gnome clans that spend their days as garden statues then become real when humans aren't looking. And the 7 dwarfs are 7 small humans, not gnomes.
Aside from the work of Huygen and Poortvliet, the most accurate portrayal of real gnomes is found in the animated television series "The World of David The Gnome." Created in Spain, the series aired on Nickelodeon. However, it's star, David, is a fictional character and some of the truths about gnomes were changed for the convenience of the series (like the fact that gnomes are nocturnal).
Aside from the work of Huygen and Poortvliet, the most accurate portrayal of real gnomes is found in the animated television series "The World of David The Gnome." Created in Spain, the series aired on Nickelodeon. However, it's star, David, is a fictional character and some of the truths about gnomes were changed for the convenience of the series (like the fact that gnomes are nocturnal).
All those websites?
Gnomes figure prominently in many modern fantasy novels, games and movies. Because of this, the Internet contains many gnome “facts” that are not actual facts about real gnomes but are fictional stories about gnome life and culture. That being said, many of the information available today about fictional gnomes is indeed close to the truth about real gnomes.
However, because some of the fictional “facts” are very, very far from the truth about real gnomes, it is important to gnow whether an information source is describing real gnomes or fictional gnomes (or simply human fantasies about neither).
However, because some of the fictional “facts” are very, very far from the truth about real gnomes, it is important to gnow whether an information source is describing real gnomes or fictional gnomes (or simply human fantasies about neither).